You know, I've been fighting an internal life-long struggle with wallflower-ism, feeling self-conscious, and developing confidence. I am so struck and awed in the presence of others who seem to have that "it" factor.
I made a new friend recently. Well, it's a friend of a friend. Another Ph.D. student in another field at another university. I really like her energy, her personality. And she has that "it." We went out last night... And how many Ph.D. students you know go out and get loose on the dance floor in red hot pants? lol. I don't wanna accuse folks around here of having a stick up their ass, but yeah, kinda...
This girl was out there getting it all by her herself - dancing like everyone was watching - and not giving a damn what other people thought. It was all about her in that very moment. It was so refreshing. I wish I knew how to cultivate the "it." I don't have it. I can mimic it for short periods of time, but it isn't part of me. And I want it.
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